The onion dating

Thousands trapped on couch by Confessions: Animal Hoarding marathon, people with facial tattoos face discrimination from potential employers, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad faces criticism for admirative comments toward Jews, older Hispanic men assemble at theaters in anticipation of new Twilight film, Beyond The Facts investigates basement spouse arguments, O'Brady Shaw comforts the wife and children of a missing soldier, this day in 1969 Apollo 12 crew-members cleaned up Apollo 11's trash on the moon, smell in local library identified as weed, and the First Responders discuss the studio's new-found sentience.

O'Brady Shaw co-hosts as a woman's loud voice disturbs the nation, new weight-loss drug causes nightmarish hallucinations around food, parents tribute dead son by continuing to update his Tumblr with insults, SIURT investigates whether SIURT reporter is responsible for ruining his family's Thanksgiving, situation worsens as loud woman has private conversation, black part of town moves across local river, Congress suggests Obama ask loud woman to quiet down, this year's hottest holiday present is Chinese Paint, and the nation is relieved as Brooke Alvarez confronts the loud woman.

Stewart's Daily Show is the advance-level class, Onion News Network is graduate school, requiring much quicker thinking and a greater tolerance for comfort-zone invasion.

Zoe Williams of The Guardian gave a mixed review of the first episode, stating that, "even by the opening credits I was smiling so much I had a sore face". "Persistently, where the programme could rip into one thing, it instead chooses something more peripheral, more candyflossy," Williams wrote.

inquired as to how a rescued girl will make up for the loss of a firefighter, ONN viewer is a boring, annoying, ugly woman with a cheating husband, and mentally handicapped son, FDA Commissioner urges Americans to "just eat a goddamn vegetable once in a while", states requiring sex offenders to wear identifying clothes in public, Biden band reuniting to play Super Bowl, Sarah Palin presidential polls boosted by morbid curiosity, perfectly good tire just sitting there behind the deli, another time traveling soldier harassed Suri Cruise, and this day in history the handjob was invented.